If it sounds too good to be true, you're going to need to change your t-shirt.

I'm a simple lady. I like to eat and drink and sit and walk. And my two favorite things are probably dogs and milkshakes. So imagine my thrill, my hope, my exhilaration, when I learned via coupon that one of these things could soon be a regular part of my life (no thanks to Charles' refusal to let a beautiful puppy bring us joy) because Edy's has invented a single-serving, at-home "Shake" that requires just adding milk and stirring! Scooping ice cream? Forget about it! Cleaning your blender? Eff that!

Hope for a better tomorrow.

I really did believe that this would increase my summer fun by, like, 400%. And then I used my coupon and the truth came out.

Never mind that these "shakes" are stored in the freezer, hence they are frozen. The directions said to add milk and stir, so gosh darnit, that's what I did. Nothing more, nothing less. And three seconds later, physics had the last laugh and my kitchen was covered in dairy.

I wish it could be that simple.

 Cleverly on the part of Edy's, my coupon was good for a discount on the purchase of 3 milk grenades, so I was afforded an opportunity for learning and growth. "This time will be different!", I thought. "I'm going to take responsibility for my role in yesterday's chocolately monsoon and leave the cup on the counter to thaw out a bit before I go human-Kitchenaid on its ass."

10 minutes rolled by and I optimistically skipped back into the kitchen and stepped right up to a nice cup of cookies and cream soup. Good one, shake. I added the milk and put it back in the freezer. And checked on it. And checked on it again. And when it was really cold, still not frozen, I grumbled with it back to the couch. And were it not intoxicatingly delicious despite its liquidity I would've sworn off this effort altogether.

By the time I figured out the perfect counter-thaw time (3 minutes), I was down to my last shake (and my last nerve) and it was vanilla and it was bland. Our verdict: While I appreciate Edy's appreciation of how much it sucks to clean a blender, I've had enough of their lies (see below). If you're still not convinced, at least wear a poncho. Learn from my mistakes.

Still half true.